Veggie Tales

There are some foods that Lisa refuses to eat.
And most of them are vegetables.
She knows that we expect her to eat them. So she'll still feed them to her mouth.
But that's where they stop. Those poor veggies never reach their gastronomical destiny. Somehow she manages to filter out the corn, peas and beans from being chewed and swallowed. Incredibly, they stay in her mouth, until she can't fit anymore food in.

At this stage, I'll ask her to chew. She won't even do that.
So tonight I left her at the table until she finished the mouthful of veges that had accumulated throughout dinner.
She was a sorry sight. She wanted to cry and scream, but she couldn't really open her mouth wide enough. She was so determined not to chew or swallow, that the excess saliva that was building up was trickling down the sides of her mouth. She was drooling profusely.
In the end though, she won. It was already 10:30pm. And we had no doubt that she would have continued until she fell asleep. So I let her spit it out. And when she ejected the mass with her tongue, it was pretty gross. All of those individual veggies, mashed and fused together in the sauna of Lisa's mouth until their identity was lost. Such a waste.
And as I looked closer, it was obvious that the mush was... very mushy.
Lisa could have easily swallowed it. But she stuck by her principles, even under the threat of a timeout in the corner.
If I wasn't so frustrated, I'd probably be impressed.

The 'if I had more time' progress report

Following from yesterday's post.
Today's scorecard was a bit hit and miss.

• I didn't spend additional time praying. In fact, I missed church altogether this morning - along with the kids. Call it Daylightsavings-itus. Marge was the only one who went, saying from the outset that she didn't want to be late this morning. By 10:05, she couldn't wait for the rest of us to get ready. Partly true. I was also home to look after Maggie, who has had a strange rash envelop most of her body since yesterday. And her temperement has matched the redness of the splotches. Bart learned a lesson though. As usual, he was taking things easy while everyone was rushing around him. He still had time to play chess with Lisa. Still had time to argue with me about the number of Queens you could have in chess. Still in his PJs as Marge grabbed the car keys and headed out the door. Suddenly he was shocked into action and raced into his room to get changed, screaming 'Tell Mummy to wait!'. But she didn't. When Bart emerged from his room (with a polo shirt and pyjama bottoms and his hair still sleepstyled) he was devastated. For the next 10 minutes, he pleaded with me to phone Marge back. To make her come back. After all, Bart had been awake since 6:30am. How could he be left behind? Sorry Bart. Not this time. Hopefully you'll start to take our words a bit more seriously in the future.
  Whoops - I digress. Today's God objective = DOH!
• But the morning's drama did leave 3 kids in my care, and therefore allowed me to spend more time with the kids - particularly with Bart. And with the wet weather, I couldn't finish the gardening I started yesterday. So today's family objective = WOOHOO!
• Books? What? When looking after 3 kids. Yeah right! Failed that one.
• Ditto for the programming. Failed that too. But I did introduce Bart to the wonders of Microsoft Powerpoint. He had fun recordng his own sound effects into his slides. He kept asking me how big my slideshows were, because he was already up to 18 slides and was going to beat it. Little does he know about the true nature of Powerpoint - the number one dumbing down tool in the workplace today.
• And the xbox? Did I have time for that?! Um... yeah. The xbox = this generation's father/son bonding tool. Throw in a copy of Star Wars Battlefront 2, and you've got father/son conversation material to last the next few days. WOOHOO! And SWB2 is a BLAST!

If I had more time in the day... or even a 3 day weekend

I would :

• Pray more. Get in touch with God. My spiritual being has been undernourished for a while, which is inexcusable. Really. When you think about our priorities in life, most of them don't even factor into the after-life. Even a non-believer will tell you that it's difficult to reach your long term goals if you keep seeking short-term gratification.
• Spend more time with the family. Quality time. Lately, Bart has been asking me to play Lego with him. I've been putting it off because there's just so much to do around the house.
• Read more books. Real books. Actual treeware. I've got a backlog of them, especially about parenting. I'm sure they have some really good stuff in them. Most of the reading I do these days is on Avantgo on my Palm. It is so handy being able to hotsync the latest news to read on the go. You could even read this blog on Avantgo!
• Do some R&D in other web technologies.
• Play with the xbox more. I've got a backlog of good games. Plus an xbox live account that hasn't been used for 2 months. Hmmm.. this falls under the category of short-term gratification...

I'll stop there. There's more I can add. But there's also a lot I can remove - from what I currently spend my time on.

Marge has reminded me, on more than a few occasions:

You're a husband and a father. You can't continue living the lifestyle of a single person.

I know she's right. But why do I still find myself awake at 4am messing around with this blog and surfing the net?
(And Bart would respond: "But it's really 3am. It's only 4am because daylight savings just started")

Hi Dad. How was your day?

Every evening, when I wander through the door after a tiring day at work, the kids have this little set-play they go through.
Actually, it starts when they hear the jingle of keys at the door and my attempts at turning 2 handles with only one hand free.
You can hear the thunder of footsteps as Bart and Lisa run race each other to the door, accompanied by their excited chanting: Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!
As I enter the house, Bart used to jump up and down like a yo-yo too - until I told him that a 'Hi Dad!' would be enough. Lisa is more restrained, just standing in the foyer smiling sweetly. And Maggie calls out some excited babytalk from her high chair, sometimes followed by a wave.
This evening, things happened a bit differently.
Bart greeted me at the door, alone. And then I heard Lisa calling from the bathroom.
"Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" THUD! Apparently, in all the excitement, she tripped over a crawling Maggie, and hit her head on the door frame.
That set the scene for a very difficult night with Lisa, as she remained quite upset all night.
And all because Daddy is hopeless at sneaking into his own house.

Do not adjust your television

I just found a free video hosting site that I can use to share some of our home vids with the rest of the world.
For my first trick, here's an example of the creativity that is unleashed when you leave your digital camera in the hands of Bart and Lisa.
Warning: This video clip contains disturbingly fast motion, and should not be viewed by persons who get dizzy playing Halo or other FPS's

Free video hosting, video codes at www.vidiLife.com

And if you enjoyed that, they've already made a sequel...

Free video hosting, video codes at www.vidiLife.com

Update (29/10): I've fixed the video settings. They should work now!

Who's there?

I just noticed that there have been 12 views of my profile.
Considering that 6 of them have been by me, I'm amazed.
Amazed that people are actually visiting my blog, and might even read my ramblings.
Isn't the internet an amazing thing?
Now all I need to do is get people to leave some comments!

Time flies when you don't have time to think

I'm still trying to work out where the weekend went!
It was just a moment ago when I came back from work on Friday night, and started to experiment with converting the Track & Field Access application into ASP. 5 hours later, I had some nice screens happening, but realised that I missed the 2nd TriNations Rugby League game between Australia and New Zealand. I found out later that Australia won. Woohoo! But it would have been a great game to watch live. DOH!
And now it's early Monday morning. I have to wake up in 5 hours to go to work.
But I've finally lodged my tax return via eTax.
I'll need to fill you in on the weekend highlights another time.

Have I mentioned that Lisa's starting to string some simple sentences and questions together?
It's improved from last week's:

Hello Gorman

(a rushed 'Hello, good morning')

Tonight we jammed her 2 Teletubbies with Cookie Monster into her baby stroller and played counting games. She asked things like 'How many hands/eyes etc' And then proceeded to count them. Well, I was impressed.
And then as she got into bed, out of the blue she said 'Good night Daddy' without needing any prompting.
I couldn't help but smile and think 'Lisa, you've just made my night.'
'Good night Lisa'.

M$ Acce$$

On Saturday, we registered Bart at the local Track and Field club.
We took Bart to his first training session this evening. It was pretty informal. He did a few practice races and learned to throw the discus. Lisa tagged along behind him when he ran. She must have run around 400m in the hour we were there.
I also talked to the Registrar about the computer system that they're using. It's an Access database and they need someone to help tidy it up and do some enhancements. Marge and I have offered to help. One of the biggest issues is the number of nested menus. We had a look at the code last night. There's around 150 menu buttons over 13 menu screens. I want to put everything on one screen - with a tabbed interface.
This should be fun. It's not the greatest development environment. And there are some things I hate about it. But I used MS Access v1.0 for my final project at Uni. And Marge used v2.0 it for hers. So it's something that we can work on together. And maybe get some additional income from it.

Night watch

I've just put Lisa back to bed.
The crying started at around midnight. I decided to give her an opportunity to cry herself back to sleep. But after 30 minutes, she was still going strong, and was probably wondering where her loving parents were. So she started walking down the hallway, still wailing. I intercepted her just before the family room and picked her up.
As usual, the loud crying turned into heavy sobbing and then she was asleep again.
And once again, I felt guilty for letting her cry that long.
But how else are we going to break this habit of the midnight howling?
What's the phone number of that Super Nanny?

Fighting against the machine.

DOH!

My whizzbang gizmo card at work don't work anymore. :(
No, that's not entirely true. It still works, but it's telling me lies.

This is the card that gets me back into the computer systems, after I leave my desk.
It tells me 'Hey Homer, try this password: IMBECILE'.
So I type that in and the computer laughs at me and impersonates 'The Count' from Sesame St.
'HA, HA, HA - That's One. One password violation! ah ah ah ah ah!'
DOH!
'Sorry Homer. I miscalculated', the card says. 'Try this password: MORON'
'HA, HA, HA - That's Two. Two password violations! ah ah ah ah ah!'
DOH! DOH!
'How about you type in: CLUELESS'
I don't even trust the card anymore, but what can I do?
'HA, HA, HA - That's Three. Three password violations! ah ah ah ah ah! Three strikes! You are OUT!'
DOH! DOH! DOH!

So I take my card to the security desk and ask them for a new one - one that doesn't mock me as much.
They say 'Sure Homer' and give me another card. 'But you have to keep the old card as well. You'll need that to get into the building'
DOH!
So I take my new card and my old card back to my desk. And try my new card.
'Yawn....sorry bud...', it says. 'You need to get someone to activate me first'
DOH!
So I take my new card and my old card to the CardMaster around the block.
She zaps the new card and it wakes up.
So I take my new card and my old card back to my desk. And try the new card.
'Hey bud! Your new password is: TAKEN4aRIDE'
So I type that in. And the computer throws a pie in my face and laughs.
' What are you trying to do Homer? Your logon has been suspended because of password violations! ah ah ah ah ah!'
doh...
So I take my new card and my old card to the CardMaster around the block. It's past 4 o'clock. She's gone already home.
<sigh>

Buy 1 superhero - Get 1 free

And apparently, with each purchase of an IncrediBoy, you also get a free limited edition IncrediGirl sidekick.
(Yes, I did think about taking a photo of IncrediBaby, but she probably would have eaten the mask)

Incrediboy

We received a package in the mail last week from my brother's girlfriend.
Inside was a very cool looking outfit. All we needed to do was add 1 little boy and BANG! Suddenly we got this hyper energised pint-sized super hero.

Australian Crydol

Maggie's cry is quite distinctive.
It starts off as a gargle and then transforms into a very throaty growl before reaching a crescendo as a yell.
I used to be concerned that she might hurt her throat, especially during sustained crying sessions. And if you get really close to her, I swear that you can feel the vibrations. There is so much bass in it. She's like a pocket subwoofer!
Over time though, I've become quite impressed. It's not a very easy cry to deliver. In fact, I think that other babies play it too safe in their cry selections. I applaud Maggie for her courage in choosing a cry that shows Australia who really she is. Again, it's a very difficult cry to perform day after day, night after night. So if you want to hear Maggie cry again next week, all you have to do is SMS 'Maggie'...

I found myself watching tonight's episode of Australian Idol- the 80's edition. Mainly because these were the songs that I grew up with. And some of the contestants were very good. Until the last guy, who raced through 'Eye of the Tiger' at 100kph. I thought he was committing Idol suicide by doing that. It lacked any feeling. It wasn't something I'd listen to again. But the audience loved it. And so did the judges, with the comment that this was for the 21st century. Man, I really must be old! It stank. But I'm sure that if Bart watched it. He would have said it was 'mad' or 'sweet'.

Maggie has left the bedroom

Another great day in history.
We'll kicked Maggie out of our bedroom. Woohoo!
This afternoon, Marge and I moved the cot and all of the stuff that Maggie has accumulated over the year into the multipurpose room (spare room / play room / guest room)
Then, as Maggie had her afternoon nap in my arms, I successfully manouvered her into her new room. She slept for around 20 minutes - and then cried. And cried. And cried.
She wasn't too impressed.
So tonight she's back in our bed...
Give it time. Marge will keep trying to get Maggie to nap in the cot during the week. (Better her than me!)
But it's good to get our bedroom back. Without all the bub stuff there, it's even starting to look like a master bedroom again.

Sleepless in da House - The Week in Review

Thank God it's Friday! Woohoo!
Today was Day 2 of the Library and Science Lab cleanup at Bart's school.
I was stuck with some tasks at work, so Marge slaved away for 2 hours on her own. She's wonderful.

We had an early dinner at Maccas so that we could put the kids to sleep early and have an early night. As always, I found other things to do than sleep:

• Watched the 2nd half of The Great Escape. Although I've heard plenty about it before, this was the first time I had watched it. Not bad for an 'old' movie. :)
• Watched the end of PTU (A Hong Kong movie) on SBS. Wished I had seen the beginning.
• Set up my Palm T3 and SE T610 GPRS so that I can post to this blog from anywhere. Almost as good as wireless. Hmmmm... Wi-fi.....

So what did we do this week?

Homer
Busy, busy, busy at work. Still getting used to the mainframe web application development environment. (mfWebAppDevEnv - from now on) Still learning heaps though - especially about XSLT and CSS. Our User Centred Design team is always talking about CSS. Now I know why. It's very interesting - and powerful. If only we educate the rest of the programmers. Interestingly, my ex-team is now finding more interesting work. I still sometimes question myself about whether I made the right decision to leave.
Have I also mentioned that I'm not getting much sleep?

Marge
Busy, busy, busy at home with the kids. Though with Bart back at school after the holidays, she's managing better.
She's also making excellent use of the state-of-the-art juicer that her Aunt bought her. We all get a glass of apple/carrot/spinach/and-whatever-else-she-wants-to-put-in-there juice everyday.
I think she's getting a bit bored too. She phoned me mid-week to say that it's time to move Maggie out of our bed (she refuses to sleep in her cot) and into her own room. Before I could say 'woohoo', she also wants to put her in Lisa's room. Lisa will move to Bart's room. And Bart will need to migrate his stuff to the guest room.

Bart
His interests haven't changed much. Still Star Wars (I must take the blame for that), Bionicles, Age of Empires (he's eager for AOE III), and baiting Lisa.
I find myself getting more and more concerned about his attitude to Lisa.
Sometimes the subtle bullying sends Lisa into tears.
Just little things, like blocking her path, or nudging past her in an effort to get somewhere before she does. Or throwing her toys around.
I'm still trying to work out what happened last night: When I got back from work, he was doing his spelling homework with Marge. But he got frustrated with every little noise, saying that he couldn't concentrate. He got so worked up over his sisters talking (even me getting my dinner) that he said he couldn't write properly.
To be fair - for the most part, he has been very well behaved. Marge reckons he's playing up because we're not giving him enough attention. I would have to agree.

Lisa
She's growing up fast. New phrases like C'mon! and some whinging that she's picked up from her sibling: Not Fair! I've noticed that she's starting to stand up to Bart. They get into some little tit-for-tat arguments that thankfully don't escalate too much. But they're funny to listen to.
This week she also started insisting that Marge or I kept her company when she went to bed. If not, she would cry until we did. Then she'd almost regularly wake up crying and screaming at around 2-3am. And then I'd comfort her till she slept again.
She restarted her swimming lessons this morning. And she loves it.

Maggie
This one also wakes up crying in the middle of the night. Several times.
This week, she started holding the bottle to feed herself.
It was also the first time that I saw her and Lisa play together so well. Maggie likes to snuggle her face into other people's faces or chests or tummys. Lisa found it hilarious when Maggie did it to her.
She's also got the handwave worked out. And she's crawling over when we call her - most times.

I was running late for work this morning...

But still, couldn't resist taking a photo of little Maggie, as she waved goodbye to me from the window.

I've noticed that she's become more responsive over the last week.
Babbling to herself a lot more. And responding to other people's smiles.

She's been walking with the Fisher Price Stride-to-Ride. Though she still loves crawling around, especially following after Lisa.

I reckon she'll be walking unassisted by the end of this month.

Bedtime stories.

As parents, we make trivial decisions everyday.
Well, they seem trivial.

Like when I had to put Lisa to bed on Monday night, and asked her to pick a book for me to read to her:

Time it took for Homer to quickly relieve himself in the bathroom: 2 minutes
Time it took for Bart to give Lisa his 'Incredibles' story book to read: < 2 minutes.
Time it took before Lisa found a scary looking drawing: 4 minutes.
Duration that Lisa slept before waking up screaming from an 'Incredible' nightmare: 3 hours.
Time it took for Homer to comfort her to get back to sleep: 2 hours.

Priceless.

Note to self: "In future, restrict the available range of bedtime stories and associated images."

2nd Post - on a roll now!

It's been a long day.

This is the latest I've been at work for quite a while now.
Though, I must admit, I don't think I've put in that many hours today.

Got in at around 11am - after going to sleep at 4am (thank you Lisa).
An hour for lunch from 12:30.
Then to Bart's school for rostered cleaning from 3pm to 5pm.
And now I'm catching the bus home at 8:35pm.

Thank God I have flexible work hours!

Welcome to my world...

My first post! And I'm emailing it in too. Woohoo!

I'd like to thank Blogger.com for providing me with this Weapon of Mass Doh-straction.
I can see this blog becoming yet another avenue for me to squander what little free time I have.
Or another hobby, started with much enthusiasm - only to be shelved and forgotten. Like a Sega Dreamcast.

But I want to persist with this.
I can see it becoming a source of great wisdom (and amusement) for my kids after they grow up.
Hopefully they will see that Marge and I did our best.
And that we weren't trying to be mean.

Yes, Bart - one day you will realise why I don't smile when you turn off the PC at the power point.
And Lisa, there are OH&S concerns when you use the handles of the kitchen drawers for rock-climbing.
And Maggie: Chess is a good game to pick up - but not for bashing the pieces against the TV screen!